Defence Secretary Basil Brush's own goal

Goals scored from within one's own half are rightly regarded as primo examples of the footballer's art, combining intelligence, spacial awareness and phenomenal skill.

Own goals from the same distance reveal the opposite - stupidity, tunnel vision and profound ineptitude. No examples in football, but plenty in politics. The most recent is this article by Lame Fox in the Telegraph.

An island nation like Britain, with so many interests in so many parts of the world – 92 per cent of trade moving by sea, around 10 per cent of our citizens living abroad – is inevitably going to be affected by global instability.

So, of course, it has been entirely correct to gut the Royal Navy, destroy naval aviation and to go ahead with the construction of two aircraftless carriers solely to keep jobs in the Clyde, which benefits only the Scottish Communist Labour party, which gave us the Psycho Cyclops and all the other north of the border apparatchiki who deliberately wrecked the economy in order to hand over the poisoned chalice to the hapless Tories.

The wanker Fox also appears to be unaware that HMS Cumberland, the command ship for the belated Libyan intervention, was on its way home to be scrapped. Please, can someone put him out of our misery?