Arsehole of the wedding: Dominic Lawson

1 May ex Queen Elizabeth II Hospital, Welwyn Garden City

Got my laptop into hospital with me to catch up on some close-deadline writing, but simply have to take a break to elect Lawson, whom I previously considered an anodyne gossip, to join the Culi Emeritus Causa on the basis of his leading article in today's Sunday Times. God knows when I’ll be able to post it, as of course there’s no wif-fi and I gave up my dongle a while back - but no worries: the kind of crap that gets you elected to the Culi is timeless.

Excluding Blair and Brown from the guest list was “the great blunder in an otherwise brilliantly conceived piece of national pageantry”. Thus Lawson in a rash effort to transcend the drivelling trivia which is all nature and nurture have equipped him to handle.

The reasons, he says, are obvious: Brown was excluded because he pulled the funding from the Royal Yacht Britannia, and Blair because he banned fox-hunting and Camilla was an “enthusiastic and intrepid foxhunter”.  

Well now: let’s take those claims at face value and see where it gets us. The second hinges on Lawson’s claim to insider knowledge that William gave his stepmother a “red pencil” to the guest list, and that she indulged it to vent personal spite. Yeah, right. That’s called projection, telling us a great deal more about the person making the allegation than about the target of the smear.

As to the Britannia, she was very old and had reached the end of her useful service life. No question of replacing her, no matter what government was in power, because it would just give ammunition to the mean-spirited mediocrities of the MSM, and to the envy-rotted, subsidy-addicted and ferociously anti-aspirational sub-humans who give modern Britain its distinctive odour of social decomp.  

   

Now let’s consider the very real insults offered the Royal Family by the leading NuLabour duo. Blair shamelessly cashed in on the death of William’s mother, and went on to pose as the “saviour of the monarchy” by forcing the Queen to respond to an episode of revolting mass hysteria that represented the antithesis of monarchy and, indeed, of basic human decency.

Brown excluded the Queen from the last commemoration of D-Day in a desperate attempt to maximise face-time with The One, apparently ignorant or indifferent to the rigid protocol that consigns prime ministers to the second rank. Also indifferent to the fact that the Queen would have been the only national figure present who had served in their country’s armed forces during the war, and that half of those who landed at D-Day honoured her father as their sovereign. 

President Obama not only insisted on the Queen being personally represented – which she was, by the hapless Charles – but both on that occasion and subsequently he brutally snubbed the toad Brown. 

So, a pair of shabby Labourite chancers have been given a small taste of the deep contempt in which they are deservedly held by the Royal Family. And Dominic Lawson does not understand it at all, because he dare not get his head out of his arse, fearing the fresh air would kill him.

Amazingly, there are still people in England who believe that there are some things you simply do not do – not because there is a law against it or because of (today non-existent) peer pressure, but because such acts would rob them of their self-respect. 

Scum like Blair and Brown – and by extension the gossipmonger Lawson – cannot comprehend a concept so alien to their squalid natures.